I can’t believe I’m going to say this but….. my apartment is in a state of disarray and I’m happy about that!
Last year about this same time, I was suffering a dislocated shoulder. Complications meant I ended up needing physical therapy, and I didn’t gain full motion of my shoulder and arm, without pain, until the end of November. That meant that any ‘serious’ cleaning, more than a “lick and a promise” (my mom used to say that, not sure where she got it from, though) happened for many, many months.
Let me assure you that this doesn’t mean I’ve got dirty dishes overflowing the kitchen sink or a toilet that hasn’t been cleaned in so long it’s brown with stains. But anything that caused a lot of use of my arm was not done.
I know a lot of people do ‘deep’ cleaning twice a year – a “spring” cleaning and a “fall” cleaning. My “fall” cleaning is about cleaning out, removing through recycle, reuse or donate things that I’m just holding on to often “in case”.
Well, obviously, I didn’t do any of that last fall, so I’m doing it now as my “spring” cleaning. Each year, in addition to the scads of stuff I realize I can donate to our local charity thrift store and never miss, I’m also working on, however slowly, things I have that have sentimental meaning only to me. 99% of these things were items passed down after my mom passed away in 1999. It took me several years to part with passed-down things I wasn’t even attached to in an emotional way, but this is a bit more difficult. I’m starting with things which I am only attached to because they were my mom’s but not otherwise enjoying. Plus, I’m finding homes with people I know will appreciate and cherish the items, and that makes it a world easier.
But, there is this disarray – – I seem to get a shorter attention span/focus the older I get. I pick some things up to put in another place, then, when I put them there, I see things there that belong in another place, so I pick them up to put them in another place, and I see things there… and so the cycle continues and one room never actually gets finished.
And yet, I’m okay with that! I can see the improvement as more and more things find their way to a new home and the rest is being reorganized to create more space. And seeing that, and how good it feels when I see it, makes it easier for me to let go of more.
It may take me a while, especially as warmer weather is finally finding its way here and I’ll want to stay in rooms that have air conditioners. But I have two very major projects I need to work on that are ‘table’ projects, so my card table (do they still call them that?) can share that space with me.
So let me say it again in this blog, because I may never say it again… my apartment is in a state of disarray and I’m happy about that!
2 thoughts on “State of Disarray”
I inherited many family heirlooms, books among them. When we started downsizing, I was torn. Luckily, a cousin gladly took it all and I felt a lot better. With other things, I found that I finally had lost personal attachment and was able to let go without guilt. It was very liberating and I was happy knowing many people benefited from our donations.
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I would have never thought I would here you speak those words, but I am proud of your progress in learning to let go of “things”. Can’t wait to see you!
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