I have many, many acquaintances. I have a good handful of friends, though the levels of friendship vary among them. There are but naught two of them whom I will be comfortable sharing my true ugly moments with, a few with whom I measure every word with thought before uttering, and everyone else falls somewhere in the middle.
A good friend of mine is very adamant about being nice and kind, convincing us through social media of the adage that “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”. And I don’t disagree with the adage. Nonetheless, it often reminds me of my self-quote (to myself, occasionally to others) about not giving out advice that you, yourself, are not willing to take.
A recent example of my having to “bite my tongue” after trying first to make my point in a kind way is… During Super Bowl Sunday, someone commented on social media a negative comment about the half-time show. I did not watch any of it, so I have no perception. This person then went on a 10-minute rant about someone thinking it was okay to make that remark. The rant, part of a YouTube video, wasn’t vicious, but it certainly wasn’t positive. I tried to explain, again, in a way I thought was kind, that it’s not logical for one person NOT to be allowed to express an opinion via social media, but it is allowable for THIS person to make several minutes of negative comments about someone, also via a social media platform?
Personally, I have nothing against people who rant – heck, I have my moments of needing to rant and I’m willing to understand that others need those moments as well. But it gripes me that anyone could possibly think that only they are permitted to voice a differing opinion.
This friend’s son, who is the one who makes the YouTube videos, has, for the past several videos, gone on a rant about how other people drive, as far as to call them stupid. These rants happen well after the fact of the actual moments that caused the negativity in the first place. This son is also one who encourages us to be kind and compassionate towards others. Needless to say, I’m really irked by this double standard, and further irked by the fact that these folks don’t even see it in themselves! If I had the technological understanding to do so, I swear I’d make a video of various clips, alternating between the “be kind” statements and the “rants”. Again, I have my moments of ‘road rage’, but they are contained in my vehicle and kept to myself.
In the world today, there are plenty of things that can push our buttons towards anger and frustration. And different people experience different events with different amounts of anger/frustration. I’m not one for saying to hold it in (trust me, I know from experience how traumatic that can be to oneself), but spew it out and let it go! Stop and think about whether this thing that’s caused you to be angry is worth the energy and time to hold onto and continue to complain about well after the moment has passed.
And please, please…. practice what you preach – or just don’t preach it!
And with that, MY rant is over!