NEWS FLASH! THIS BREAKING NEWS JUST IN:
We are all human. Each of us has flaws. Each of us is imperfect. Each of us makes mistakes. Each of us has strengths. Each of us has weaknesses. Each of us has unique talents. Each of us chooses the path we walk. Each of us chooses our own words, our own behaviors and our own actions.
I think I know my readership well enough to know that most of you are thinking, “Yea, I know that. What’s the point?” The truth is, you are not the people who need to read this post. Sadly, I don’t know how to reach the people who need to read and learn.
I had a conversation with one of my Mixer family members recently (hi, MrWillDeal!) about behavior and ownership/accountability for it. In this online realm of cyberspace, we have the anonymity of a computer screen which allows us to present ourselves as we choose. Some people use the anonymity to expose their vulnerabilities without fear of judgement (I fall in that category); some people use it to vent out anger and unresolved emotional issues by bullying and rudeness to other people sharing the same space. In either way, I guess, there is no real fear of consequences for those behaviors, but no one will condone bullying – in any form – as positive and acceptable behavior.
Will is a streamer on the Mixer channel. I met him through another streamer, and it didn’t take long for me to see that he qualifies as good people. He is amazingly kind, a good listener, a positive role model and has patience to the ends of the earth. He engages everyone who enters his streams and genuinely let’s the people there know how much he appreciates them. When I think of the words “going above and beyond”, that’s what Will does in his streams for people.
Recently, one of his very first followers began to be very disrespectful toWill, in the public of the chat room where all could see. He was given countless warnings and an equal amount of asking him to stop. When the behavior just continued, for the sake of the rest of the people, this person was banned (he can never return to that streamer’s room). Apparently, this person got outraged enough to go around to other streamers, trashing Will, playing the victim.
I’ll stop the story there because it makes my point. Here is this anonymous person behind a computer stream, who is harmful and disrespectful to others and not only has no accountability for his actions, but plays the victim!! How messed up is that???
I grew up learning pretty quickly that behaviors had consequences and I learned so quickly because my mother had a wooden paddle (handmade and carved with her name in it) and she wasn’t afraid to use it. She was definitely of the “punish now, ask questions later” breed.
But still, I learned. And while this is a wide generalization, so many children being raised these days don’t have consequences for their negative behavior, yet expect rewards for their positive behavior. I’m reminded of an old joke that starts with a little boy telling his mom “I’ll be good for a quarter.” When did things change from when good behavior was expected and the norm???? When did we start permitting children to bribe us to get them to behave???? And worst yet, when did parents lose their backbones and start giving in????
Those are the people I wish I could get to read this article. Those parents who allow their kids to run rampage without paying attention – those parents who need to step up a bit to what it means to be a parent – and those kids old enough to understand that they will not get very far in life if they don’t start to take responsibility for their actions.
However, I doubt it will find its way to the people who need it most and in the end, it will just be me taking some time to stand on my soapbox and preach to the choir! 🙂 Thanks for listening to my rant! ::Steps down from soapbox again::
4 thoughts on “Accountability”
I agree. It’s also too easy for people to behave in a completely unacceptable way behind a computer screen because it’s pretty difficult to hold them accountable. Having said that I do appreciate being able to hide behind a computer screen but I hope I will always treat others well even from here.
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I would agree. Even the best raised child can find hide in the anonymity of cyberspace and be anything they want. From Saint to sinner. Most often people project their best selves. They represent themselves as a polished version of all their best qualities. But some choose to unleash unresolved issues in an attempt to feel better about themselves. The screen is a barrier and we never truly know the people on the other side. Except me, of course, your loving bro! ❤
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It’s funny how technology helps breed a totally different generation with different views, norms and values.. Keyboard warriors is what we call them in the bizz. Banning is how we deal with them 🙂 !
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I remember this! It is extremely difficult to be patient in these situations. Unfortunately in terms of “release” or “gratification” not a second thought goes by when people like this feel they can anonymously break another person down. They may feel empowered? Excited to finally have an upper hand?
I’m not sure, but I’ve never tolerated when it gets to that “point” in IRL & it would only seem likely I would feel the same way online.
What is unique for me is that I respond two ways to bullying. It’s either quite passively or extremely aggressively. Is that only me?? I cannot find that sweet middle ground? Maybe that’s normal and how it’s supposed to be?? I’m still new to the streaming thing, but IRL I’ve been bullied quite a bit across the spectrum, but it has never negatively affected me and it’s almost as if I’m the one that feels bad for that particular person for not being able to express themselves in different ways. Not one time have I taken any of it seriously. Is that the true essence of knowing one’s self? Who even knows, but I also know that when I find that point of no-return.. in my little pea brain I’m telling myself, “Welp you may as well provide to the fullest extent of butt whoopins!!” – haha! Wouldn’t that be considered bullying, too? Probably not and heck, let’s be real some people can use a taste of their own medicine.
Thank you for thinking of me and saying such nice things!! It’s a pleasure to have such a great mind around.
What’s the opposite of an internet troll??
Wizard of all things nice and intelligent? Well whatever it is you’re it 🙂
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