The Little Green Man

When I was growing up, in addition to my siblings, parents and an occasional odd pet, our house was inhabited by a little green man. Now, in all of my years of living there, I’d never seen him, nor, I suspect, did anyone else. But I recall clearly, when something was broken/spilled/etc. and my mother asked which of us had done it, to which we all replied, “Not me!”, she would sometimes say that the little green man must have done it.

It didn’t take us long to realize, as we got older, that mom had merely decided that, whatever ‘crime’ had been committed, it wasn’t worth dragging the truth from us. I do remember a time when, asked of us who had done something, my older brother defiantly answered, “The little green man”. That got him a smack in the face!

I’d largely forgotten about the little green man for years. But lately, not only do I think my home might be inhabited by its own little green man, I’m beginning to think he brought some friends along who are inhabiting my body!

Every so often, I walk into a room, something catches my eye, and I ponder, “Now how did that get there?” Other times, I swear I know exactly where I left something, only to return and find that it is NOT there! Obviously, a little green man is sneaking around and moving things when I’m not looking!

And my body! Surely it must be filled with little green gremlins with odd senses of humor! How else can I explain the physical twinges of pain that come and go in an instant when I am perfectly still? How else can I explain that sudden urge that pulls me to the freezer at odd hours of the night and demands that I eat several large spoons full of ice cream? And since I mentally make a list of things I want to accomplish each morning, then find my body craving a nap before I’ve started, can’t that surely can be contributed to the tiredness of those same gremlins who had me standing in front of the freezer in the middle of the night?

Was my mother right? Do all homes have a little green man who resides within their walls? And maybe, just maybe, are the little green gremlins invading my body a punishment for those few (especially compared to my brothers) times when it was me who had done something bad and not the little green man? Is this the karma he wished on me those times I let him take the blame?

I suppose I’ll never know…